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- "Kill the Wayne family? I don't think that's a very good idea, Bert."
- ― Ernie Chill
Ernie Chill is the mugger who brutally, brutally, brutally killed Batman's parents. A member of the Sesame Street crime family, and a close associate of Bert Moxon who had ordered the death of Thomas Wayne and his wife.
Gangs of GothamEdit
Joe "Ernie" Chill was born in Gotham City in a poor neighborhood filled with organized crime. As a teenager, he acted as a runner for the Bertinelli gang, smuggling drugs inside of small rubber ducks that could be used for bathtime fun. He got his first big start when lifetime friend Bert Moxon became a made man.
Murder in Crime AlleyEdit
From such humble origins, Ernie would go on to become one of the least famous most infamous villains in villainfamous history.
After Thomas Wayne witnessed him commit a crime, Bert Moxon believed he had no choice but to murder the man's entire family except for his son and butler. One fateful night, Ernie was sent to murder the beloved Waynes as they were coming out of the movie theater. He cornered them in an alley, grabbed Martha Wayne's pearls, and when he was done, there was popcorn and soda all over the place. The young Bruce watched the entire thing with his own two eyeballs, and grew up swearing vengeance upon all the criminals in the world.
Despite having done an absolutely bang-up job, afterward, Ernie strangely felt little sense of accomplishment. Unlike most of his other victims, he didn't even take the time to satisfactorily skull-fuck Martha Wayne's corpse. It was almost as if he felt that somehow by killing this innocent family and traumatizing their child, he hadn't done a good job.
Death of a scoundrelEdit
When the all-growed-up Batman (Bruce Wayne) learned of Ernie's involvement in the death of his parents, he started harassing him constantly. Despite Chill's attempts to garner a restraining disorder, he found that mysterious terrifying vigilantes of the night don't necessarily have to pay attention to them.
In an attempt to get away from his life of crime in Gotham City, Ernie became an informant on the Big Bird Falcone organization. When his treachery was discovered, he was sentenced to a brutal whacking by the Count, and buried in an unmarked grave. Such is the life of a criminal.
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