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This article is about The fat fuck that's just simply a fat fuck. You may be looking for The Fat fuck who made a criminal empire.

FatBastard
The Blob

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Biographical information

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Born
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50 pounds

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Died
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Heat attack at 4500

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Nationality
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Blob, since he is his own country

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Career

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Occupation
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This guy? Work?

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This is the most pathetic villain on the earth. Yeah, I know we say that a lot, but come on. He'll tell you he got his fat because he's a mutant, but in reality, he just eats way to god damned much. In fact, I'd venture as far as saying this man is the most pathetic thing on the planet.

Look at them man boobs. They must be Double D's, for the God's sake. He probably hasn't seen his penis since grade school. He probably got picked on and thrown rocks at, and had to sit in the back of the room at a big table to work.

So, he went into crime, thinking he could hurt people with his bulk. Nope, that didn't work, he kept getting stabbed and shot and his weight didn't help him, it hindered him. And so he got fatter, and fatter, and fatter.

He's probably siting on the floor in his home in California eating cake batter out of a bowl. Damn, this guy is pathetic. He ain't going to die from a pencil like all the cool kids, he's gonna have a heart attack while trying to stand up!

Let him die. What do we care?

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